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Ep. 50: Recasting the first Mighty Ducks movie


Jake Gyllenhaal recently revealed he was picked to play Charlie Conway in the Mighty Ducks before his parents made him turn it down. In light of that Mike, Tommy, and Kevin decide to re-cast the whole movie, starting with Gyllenhaal as Conway.

Show Notes:

Here’s Jake Gyllenhaal talking about the Mighty Ducks:

For the record: Here’s the sports site Mike was reading the quote from. This story says that Gyllenhaal was picked to play Charlie Conway. 

Eddie Murphy’s list of characters in The Nutty Professor. 

Maggie Gyllenhaal is three years older than Jake.

Here’s Kristen Bell/Christian Bale video Kevin was making a reference to:

The girl who played Zenon is Kirsten Storms.

Nick Cannon is n0 longer married to Mariah Carey. He filed for divorce in December 2014. 

Taylor Kitsch was 11 years old when the first Mighty Ducks movie came out.

This is Donkey Lips:



A George Coe obituary

Thanks to @graceholl21 for the #QuackQuestion.

Hans’ No. 11 jersey:


We talked more about the media in Episode 5. The Ducks’ game against Trinidad and Tobago was written about on March 1, 1994.

Our new cast: 

Les Averman – Ludacris

Adam Banks – Casey Garven

Charlie Conway – Jake Gyllenhaal

Tammy Duncan – Kirsten Storms

Tommy Duncan – Danny Tamberelli

Guy Germaine – Leonardo DiCaprio

Greg Goldberg – Chris Pratt

Jesse Hall – Derek Luke

Terry Hall – Nick Cannon

Dave Karp – Jonah Hill

Fulton Reed – Taylor Kitsch

“Reed” Larson – Josh Jackson

Peter Mark – Aaron Paul

McGill – Michael Fassbender

Connie Moreau – Natalie Portman


Ep. 49: Special guest Casey Garven a.k.a. Larson from the Hawks


Casey Garven, the actor who played Hawks player Larson joined Mike, Tommy and Kevin for a podcast about how he was supposed to play Banks, which of the actors were pompous, Mighty Ducks groupies, and the one time he was recognized for being Larson.

Show notes:

Shoutout to Casey Garven for being an awesome dude.

You can hear the jingle Casey’s grandpa wrote in this Hamm’s beer commercial:

Here’s Larson before the state championship game in the scene Casey talked  about. This is the legitimate I-will-run-you-over-with-my-BMX-bike-and-eventually-my-car-when-I’m-old-enough-to-drive snarl. This was also the scene when told somebody  “Shut the fuck up!’ That didn’t make it in the final movie.



Steven Brill’s full IMDB page. 

Reed Larson played in the NHL from 1976 to 1990. He’s a Minneapolis native and the former captain of the Detroit Red Wings. 

Thanks to @joyceeng61 for the #QuackQuestion

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A new USA TODAY front page

Back in Episode 47 we maligned USA TODAY’s design of the front page when they had Russ on the cover. Kevin promised to redesign it. Here is the new front page:


For reference, the original:

Russ Tyler

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Ep. 48: Would the Mighty Ducks be good at any other sports?


Mike, Tommy, and Kevin discuss whether Fulton Reed made a mistake is forgoing football, whether any other Mighty Ducks would be good at other sports. They also take a #QuackQuestion on the Ducks’ former District 5 coach. Who was he?

Show notes

“Is it true what they say, about the scholarships and how they won’t let you play hockey?”

We talked about pro potential in Episode 7. The conversation on Fulton starts at 20:59.

This is The Program for those who didn’t know.

Dwayne Robertson’s roping abilities:

We talked about Kenny Wu in Episode 17.

Thanks to @joyceeng61 for the #QuackQuestion.

Guy’s hair in D1:


This is where Peter describes what happened to their former coach:

Seriously, listen to our theory on Hans in Episode 11.

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Ep. 47: What happened to the five Ducks left off the Junior Goodwill Games roster?


Mike, Tommy, and Kevin explore the five original Ducks who didn’t make the Junior Goodwill Games team. Why weren’t they included on the squad? Were Jesse and Terry secretly fighting over Tammy? Could they ever reconcile with the rest of the Ducks?


Show Notes

The five original Mighty Ducks left of the Junior Goodwill Games:

1. Tommy Duncan

2. Tammy Duncan

3. Peter Mark

4. Dave Karp

5. Terry Hall


The five players they add for the Junior Goodwill Games (not including Russ Tyler, who comes later):

1. Julie Gaffney

2. Kenny Wu

3. Dean Portman

4. Luis Mendoza

5. Dwayne Robertson


Razzmatazz is a real word. According to the Meriam-Webster dictionary, razzmatazz is “a noisy and exciting activity to attract attention.”

The Little League World Series is open to 11 to 13 year-old-players.

Charlie and his Duck call:


Terry’s face when he’s talking about Tammy:


We talked about Peter Mark’s feelings about being left off the U.S. team in Episode 46. 

We talked about Jesse Hall’s trip to public school in Episode 24. 

Thanks to @corbettsmithDMN for the #QuackQuestion. The poorly designed page we talked about:

Russ Tyler

We talked about USA TODAY more in depth in Episode 5.

The correct past tense for weep is wept.

Our Facebook is facebook.com/quackattackpod.





iTunes again, because it’s that important to us. 



Ep. 46: Peter Mark might be more mature than you give him credit for


From participating in the dog poop prank to his giveaway in the state finals, Mark plays a understated in a critical role with the Mighty Ducks. Mike, Tommy, and Kevin explore all this and then figure out what happened when the Ducks moved on without him.

Show Notes

The speech that Peter Mark confused:


Karp looking to Peter Mark during Bombay’s speech that forms the Ducks:

Also, notice Peter automatically flipping his stance on the Ducks as soon as a couple other people decide to be Mighty Ducks.

Does Peter Mark have a Napoleon complex?

We talked about Tommy’s strong stance that Dave Karp is the worst player on the Mighty Ducks in Episode 6. 

Peter blowing it in the finals against the Hawks:


If you’re unfamiliar familiar with Hans’ empire, listen to Episode 11.

Kevin compares Peter Mark and Dave Karp to the two dudes in My Name is Earl. He means Peter Mark is this guy (Earl):


And that Karp is this guy (Randy):

Shoutout to Rachel Sullivan for the #QuackQuestion. Go to rachelsullivanphotography.com.

We spoke about Orion’s job being solely about developing players in Episode 37 and Episode 38.

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Ep. 45: Who was the best child actor in the Mighty Ducks?


Mike, Tommy, and Kevin debate who would’ve done the best job as a child actor had these documentaries been made into feature-length films. They also take on the greatest #QuackQuestion to date: Were any players on the Mighty  Ducks secretly gay?

Show notes:

The full list of actors and their characters can be found at the IMDb pages for each film:




Kenan Thompson started his career with D2 in 1994, then got All That the same year. His next two movies were Heavyweights and D3. Kenan didn’t get Kenan and Kel until 1996.

“I woke up, and the pain was gone.”

We talked about Banks’ inner demons in Episode 12.

This is what Aaron Schwartz, the kid who played Karp, looks like now:


Via @AaronSchwartz11

All the child actors in the Mighty Ducks appear to be alive, based on cursory Google searches.

Michael Cudlitz, who played Cole, the blonde-haird bully on Varsity, is Sgt. Abraham Ford in The Walking Dead.

Thanks to @wolffchele for the #QuackQuestion.

Connie and Guy making out at the end of D1:


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Ep. 44: What’s the best the coach speech to his team in the Mighty Ducks trilogy? (Part 2)


In the conclusion of this two-part podcast, Mike, Tommy, and Kevin discuss the ‘Ducks Fly Together’ speech at the end of D2 and Coach Orion’s ‘It starts with a ‘W” speech in D3. They then pick the best speech and answer the #QuackQuestion, courtesy of @graceholl21.


Show notes:

You should really listen to Episode 43 before this one. 

Ducks fly together:

It starts with a ‘W':

We talked about Coach Orion developing players instead of winning in Episode 37 and Episode 38. 

Here is a bonus speech:

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Ep. 43: What’s the best the coach speech to his team in the Mighty Ducks trilogy? (Part 1)


Show notes:

Shoutout to @katshan23 for suggesting the topic.

Speech No. 1:

Bombay clearly standing in front of a Cardinals logo, proving he’s giving his speech before the Cardinals game:



Bombay’s third speech, speaking to the team during detention:

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Ep. 42: How Gordon Bombay should’ve cheated


Mike, Tommy, and Kevin break down Gordon Bombay’s cheating tactics. They examine who was in, who was out, and they figure out the best way to rig a peewee hockey game. Plus, they take a #QuackQuestion relating to Gunnar Stahl.

Show notes:

We discussed Bombay’s penchant for turning to cheating in Episode 1. 

This is Karp’s face when he’s storming out after Jessie’s dad comes in to yell at Gordon about cheating:



Goldberg pleading with the refs:


Connie being forced to trip Guy:


Kevin wasn’t that far off from the ref’s pay. A ref is probably making $35-$40 game for a peewee game.

If you’re unsure on how much we know about Hans, listen to Episode 11. 

Thanks to @kating9 for our #QuackQuestion

Gunnar Stahl:


And Scooter: